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August 2020 Moms’ Support Group: All About You- Episode 44

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Welcome back to the All About Audiology podcast. I’m your host, Dr. Lilach Saperstein Au.D. This is the show where we explore how audiology affects you and your family, not just what are all these terms and graphs and charts and equipment, but what does it mean for you, when you or someone you love is going through learning that they have a hearing loss, understanding what that means, how that’s going to affect their life. And here we open up the dialogue about the topics that we don’t just need to be having with ourselves, amongst ourselves, you know, whoever is “the group”, for example, teachers are constantly talking with other teachers, excellent. And audiologists are talking to other audiologists, and parents are having support groups with other parents. But what if we all came together?

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And had one big conversation. And that’s the purpose of this podcast and what happens in our community. Because the #allaboutaudiology community includes teachers of the Deaf, and parents of children along the spectrum of hearing, and audiologists, and audiology students and speech therapists and educators, and parenting experts, and all the different people who have something to say about the topics that we talked about here. So I hope you had a chance to listen last week and if you haven’t, go check out Episode 43 with Genia Stephen, and we talked about one of those topics that really affects every parent who has a child with a disability. Every parent, really just anyone who’s thinking about what are the goals and what is the vision that you have for your child or for your student or for yourself, basically, it was one of those

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topics and conversations that really gets you thinking and makes it that you have to address the questions and the issues that you’re facing. You cannot just let them fester or work themselves out because that is not going to work. You have to be involved in those decisions. So definitely check out Episode 43. And as always, full transcripts are available at all about audiology calm, and I am so grateful to Sara Miller from @adventuresinDeafEd, for the shout out on Instagram this week about transcribing and making the podcast accessible. I really, really value inclusivity and having as many people be part of the conversations we’re having as possible. And I recognize that as a podcast, which is an auditory medium that is not inclusive to those with hearing loss or those who are deaf. And so from the very beginning, I knew that if I was going to

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put out a podcast about audiology, with the values and the mission of the podcast, it would have to be transcribed and become accessible. And so I do that. And actually that is

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another one of the very big expenses of the podcast. And recently I started a Patreon account for those listeners who are able to support the show who believe in the mission and in the community that we’re creating, to be able to support the show. So please head on over to patreon.com/allaboutaudiology, to become a patron and see the perks that are available to you there. The students who are interested in joining our international office hours, which are the first Wednesday of every month, and you’re able to join those by becoming a patron for $15 per month.

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And today I want to talk specifically to the moms. Again, I’m always very inclusive about caregivers and parents. But I do think that, from now on, I say “moms” I really do include all

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Have the people who are in that position in the life of your child. But I am just going to be using the word “moms”, because that is the majority of our listeners and the people I interact with. But I in no way am meaning to exclude dads and grandmas, and any other version of caregivers and people who care about the children in your life. So, today, I want to talk to you about another program that is starting up in August. We’ll be starting on August 2. Every Sunday in August, we’re going to have a group live call. And this program is going to be an exploration of the past the future and the present. This paradigm of looking at past future and present is a framework that I use to help us to process. And so if you are pulling out your hair already with the last couple months that have been turning our world upside down, and if you’re freaking out about school being on again-off again, we don’t really know what’s going to happen.

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If you find yourself really overwhelmed and not knowing if you’re doing the right thing for your child, [deep breath]

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it’s totally, totally natural to feel overwhelmed and unsure and anxious, especially as you’ve been spending all this time figuring out their hearing loss, you finally know about all those little parts and pieces of their devices. And you finally figured out what the services they need and you have an IEP and now the sky has fallen! Everything is different; services are up in the air. And it’s really challenging to make the decision: Are you going to send back to school? What’s going to be the story with masks? Are you considering homeschooling? These are some of the big decisions that many moms and other parents are facing right now for your kids and I wanted to create a space in August, where we can come together and have a safe place and a confidential space for a small group of moms to get together.

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For those of us who are ready to feel confident in your mothering again, and at the end of August, my goal and my hope is that you will feel calmer about all the uncertainty. That you will know how to handle the meltdowns. Not only your kid’s meltdowns, but your own, and we all have them. [laughing] And you’ll know what you need to do to support their development, you’ll be more clear on your goals for your child and the vision like we talked about in the previous episode. I’ll also teach you about The F-I-G Method, which is my signature method for advocacy.

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You’ll not only have a place to talk about the technical audiology questions that you know, you just wish you had more time to talk to your audiologist about but right now it’s super hard to get an appointment. So you’ll be able to speak without any ologists That’s me. But at the same time you also have that safe space to work through the emotional aspects of this journey. And that is not to be taken lightly.

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You know if you’ve been listening to this podcast that audiology for me is a really holistic and important part of people’s lives. I don’t just see the technical, the buttons and the reports and the anatomy. Of course those things are important, but it matters-but the reason that it matters is because it affects your ability to communicate with your child. It affects the relationship that you develop, no matter what modality of communication you’re using. And so over the five weeks, we’re going to have five weekly group calls on Sunday- There are five Sundays this August- and you’ll also get a bonus of a personal one to one session with me which is valued at $250. But you will be able to join this group program and have that group session all for $200.

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This will be a small group I’m going to be limiting the number of participants. And you’ll have a lot of personal attention from me as well as the confidential support of the other moms who join. And by the end of August, I really expect and hope that you can be in a completely different mindset. It’s not going to happen overnight and I am going to give you homework assignments. And but I truly truly understand that we are inundated with the story of mom guilt. Before our children are even born we already have so much that’s our responsibility as mothers. And we are responsible and we do have a lot on our plate. But we cannot neglect ourselves. We cannot forget that it’s important for us to stay strong so that we can help our kids and caring for yourself in this way is caring for your child.

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We are getting started on August 2. If you are interested in joining send me an email to Lilach@allaboutaudiology.com or through Instagram or through Facebook. I check all my DMS and I will send you the details how to join. And I want to let you know that I am making this affordable and accessible. And I want it to be something that those of you who are feeling called to join a program like this will not be held back. This is an action-oriented program, we’re going to meet five times in August, Plus you’ll have that one, one on one call with me. And we’re going to see a change, you’re going to see a change in your stress level, we’re going to see a change in your whole outlook, about this journey by looking at things from the past and the things that we carry our guilt from. And we’re going to look at the future, the future that we are always so anxious about and have so many worries and fears about and finally we’re going to come back to the present and remember that that’s all we really have.

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The connection to our children by being present. By playing their favorite games, by enjoying foods together, by going outside and enjoying the sunshine. And it’s kind of impossible to be present when you are preoccupied with “past” thoughts and with “future” thoughts. Now, I’m not like a Zen Buddhist monk, I am a very practical person and totally am learning all these things as well. This is a journey that we’re all on. But I do bring the audiology lens into it. And I do really respect the time and the emotional investment that parents put in when you’re on this journey. So again, if you are ready to send me a DM and we will set this up, I can’t wait to see some of you in the group program in August.

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And for the rest of you, check out last week’s episode about creating a vision for your child’s life. And I will keep working on those interviews coming up for you; lots of exciting episodes this season that I’m working on. And thank you again to our patrons. I have to shout out Darla who is the first patron of the podcast. She is awesome. She is a student of Audiology from the Philippines. And I am so grateful that she is the first patron of the podcast. If you would like to be shouted out on the podcast as well and have my everlasting gratitude, become a patron at patreon.com/allaboutaudiology. Thank you so much for listening or reading the podcast. I’m Dr. Lilach Saperstein Au.D. And this is the All About Audiology podcast.

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